Indoda Ayikhali – But Why Not?

“Indoda ayikhali”—a man does not cry. It’s a phrase many boys grow up hearing, especially in African households. It's repeated as a badge of strength, but in reality, it teaches men to bottle up emotions until they explode—or implode. Crying is human. Feeling pain is human. Processing grief, disappointment, and trauma should not be limited by gender. At Unsilenced Men (USM), we challenge harmful social norms like “suck it up” and promote healing through emotional intelligence and community dialogue. We believe the healthiest men are the ones who allow themselves to feel, heal, and speak out without fear of losing their identity. Let’s build a future where “Indoda Ayikhali” becomes “Indoda Iyakhuluma”—a man speaks up.